Anonymous' Story

Nine years ago, I was 14 at the time, I lost my big brother to suicide. He didn't live with us anymore but came home that night. 

In the years that followed I went to counseling due to not being able to sleep. I barely kept at counseling though. I said I was fine and that was that. 

Last year my sister, who is 30 and has 2 children, admitted she was struggling with depression and anxiety and went to the doctor's and sought help. 

Even though I'm the youngest, I've always been the strong one or felt like I had to act the strong one. Help everyone else.

Last year I flew across the world to Australia, on my own, and travelled for 6 weeks. It was the happiest I've felt in so long but then reality hit when I got home. 

A few weeks ago, talking to my sister, I broke down completely. I told her about my self harming, that I haven't had a full nights sleep in 9 years and how I'm on the verge of tears daily. For the first time in I can't remember how long I don't feel alone anymore. I've finally sought out help, she came to the doctors with me and is an amazing support. 

I know this is only the beginning of my seeking out help, but it's a step in the right direction and I couldn't have done this without the support of people online as well as family. 

It's people like yourselves who help people like me seek out help and not suffer in silence. For that I say a huge thank you! 

Sorry for the long winded story which may get lost in the rest of them. I appreciate the outlet though, just what I needed! 

anonymous x