2014 was a year that changed everything for me. Leaving my partner of 5 years after emotional blackmail and abuse and physical abuse. As toxic as the relationship was I could never bring myself to leave. I suddenly fell pregnant ON the pill after being told I wouldn’t be able have children and my whole perspective on life had changed.
I knew I couldn’t bring my child up around parents who were bad for each other.
I left at 12 weeks pregnant and never looked back. My son will be 5 this year and I live with the bad memories, triggers, anxiety of the relationship every single day. Not a day goes by where I don’t see something or hear something that reminds me of a bad memory or the way I was treated and the abuse I endured.
A common question that gets asked is “why didn’t you just leave him?” Now if you’ve ever been in a position like this you will understand that it is never that easy. The thought of leaving and wondering what will happen to you is more scary then to just stay in the toxic relationship.
I just wanted to share my story to let women and men know that you take all the time you need to build up the courage to leave. My son is my miracle in life and he is the main reason I left but It was also easier for me to leave once I had spoke to few people and told them what was happening and they made me realise that this just wasn’t right.
Speak up and don’t be scared.
There is so much support surrounding you, more than you know. Stay strong and be true to yourself. It will be hard at the start but hey you’re as strong as they come after the things you have gone through so how bad can it really be to leave?